Pioneer

As I prepare for this trip and realize that I have no idea what I am doing. That I am forging into waters not traveled previously by anyone in my family. It takes me back to my childhood.
                                                           
I was 9 years old when my mom stepped into the rooms of recovery. Completely changing the trajectory of our family. I remember being totally resentful. I mean, while we were completely dysfunctional, it was also completely normal to us. To our family. My dad, my brother and I gave her such a hard time for it. But she just kept going. Kept seeking out truth, pursuing something she unknown because she knew that there had to be more to life than that what we were doing. She was a pioneer. She was walking over mountains and through deep valleys following after a calling from God. A whisper of Hope.

 Over the past 24 years I have become very grateful she did. Despite how hard her family was on her, or how lonely the journey was, or how messy it was or is. Because she choose to obey, and walk forward, even by herself, I knew where to go for help in my darkest hour of despair. She allowed God to open doors for our family that would take us from surviving in life, to thriving in life.

Today, as I start a journey for my family and having literally no idea what I am doing, I find myself far beyond gratitude for her journey. I haven't been “on mission" before. I'm not educated in these things. I have no "experience". I am going forward blind, over mountains and through valleys. Sometimes alone, sometimes afraid, but I keep pressing on, pressing into God, because I know that I am following after God and his desire for our lives.

One of my many prayers for this trip is for my daughters. My prayer is that the legacy I create goes far beyond them.  That they would live in a way that brings life to others and that it would be imbedded in who they are, and not just what they do.  That their hearts would break for the things that break Gods heart and that they would be global game changers because of it.